Up in the sky.

One day last week, the girls are I were out running errands. We were driving down the road and Addi asked me why the sun was “being lazy bones and not waking up?” I told her that it was just cloudy and might rain. She kept looking in the sky and proceeds to take the conversation to a much deeper level…

Addi: “Mommy, I’m trying to see Jesus and Poppy up in the sky, but I can’t.”

Me: “Oh honey, we won’t be able to see them until the day we get to go to heaven.”

Addi: (with tears in her eyes): “But Poppy’s not gonna see me as a little girl. He won’t remember what I look like. Maybe I should go ahead and go to heaven now and grow up there?”

Me: (trying not to cry): “Mommy doesn’t want you to go to heaven yet, I want you to stay here with me. But one day, hopefully far far from now when you are old, you will go. Poppy will remember you, baby. And he’ll be so excited to see you.”

Addi: “Well, maybe I should send him a picture of me as a little girl. I think he misses me.”

Me: “I bet God gives Poppy a window out of heaven every now & then so he can look down and see you growing up and I’m sure he smiles really big when he sees you!”

Addi: “I miss Poppy.”

Me: “I know sweetheart, me too.”

It seriously blows me away how much this girl understands and how her heart is still grieving the loss of her Poppy. She talks about him almost daily. I heard recently on the radio that usually the first experience kids have with death is the loss of a pet. Nope, not in our case – is what I muttered under my breath when I heard that. It’s so very hard to lose a parent. It’s also hard to see your children’s hearts breaking because of that loss, even close to a year later. I can only imagine how my own mom feels. But, gosh how thankful I am that I can say with absolute confidence to my children that one day we will see him again. Thanks to Jesus, we have that hope! One day, we will look up in the sky and see Dad/Poppy and Jesus very clearly. And no matter how old we are when that day comes, he will recognize us and welcome us in to paradise with arms wide open. Then, there will be no more heartache, no more pain, no more tears.

But in the mean time, here’s a pic…